[to the tune of “The 12 Days of Christmas”] In the first month of ownership, my heart horse gave to me, a nail in the sole of his foot. In the second month of ownership, my heart horse gave to me, large abscesses In the third month of ownership, my heart horse gave to me,Continue reading “The 12 Months of Ownership”
Category Archives: Me Being a Writer
How COVID Stole Christmas
How COVID stole Christmas (a parody)
Two-lane Roads Diverged
Driving through Virginia this week, I’m pretty sure I discovered why so many rural Americans voted for President Trump: it’s because they have had to follow two slow-as vehicles on a two-lane road. One you can handle. Two just make you long for anarchy. Everything feels stagnant, and any kind of change would be welcome.Continue reading “Two-lane Roads Diverged”
Dear Me
Dear ten-year-old version of myself, Today I ate an entire yellow bell pepper for lunch because I’m an adult, and I can do what I want. There are some real advantages to this growing up business. Don’t get me wrong, the dire stories you hear about responsibility and paying bills and doing taxes are real.Continue reading “Dear Me”
Copyright and Copywrong
“It’s on the Internet, so it must be okay to use it.” Nooooooooooooooooo. As a long-time writer and blogger who currently works in the publishing industry, this has to be one of the most cringe-worthy statements I hear from fellow bloggers. And although most lawyers may be snarks, not all snarks are lawyers, so pleaseContinue reading “Copyright and Copywrong”
How do you solve a problem like millennials?
(It’s not quite the Von Trapps or Margery McKay, but it’ll do. #nerd) How do you solve a problem like millennials? How do you catch their eye and sell them stuff? How do you find a word that means millennial: a narcissist man-child? a delicate flower? our pride? Many a thing you know you’d likeContinue reading “How do you solve a problem like millennials?”
Sonnet #2016, for North Carolina
Sonnet #2016 If Shakespeare saw beyond the mask of death Sir Walter’s face stamped on this legal tryst, I think he’d turn to Richard, to Macbeth, to see what strain of tyranny he’d missed. He could not understand the roots of power so well as all the teachers have portrayed yet be so speechless onContinue reading “Sonnet #2016, for North Carolina”
The 12 Gifts Adulthood Gave to Me
On the first day of Christmas, adulthood gave to me…a dishwasher full of clean plates On the second day of Christmas, adulthood gave to me…unlimited museums On the third day of Christmas, adulthood gave to me…hole-free socks On the fourth day of Christmas, adulthood gave to me…sleeping in ’til 8 On the fifth day ofContinue reading “The 12 Gifts Adulthood Gave to Me”
Nominated for the Pushcart Prize!
From vox poetica: 12.05.14 Posted in today’s words by Annmarie Lockhart It never gets easier, but it still makes me happy! I’m pleased to announce this year’s vox poetica nominations for the Pushcart Prize: Burning a Hole in Daylight by Harry Calhoun Holding On by Jeanette Cheezum Moon by Neil Ellman Saying please by Susan Sweetland GarayContinue reading “Nominated for the Pushcart Prize!”
The Happiest Little Introvert’s Night on the Town: A Child’s Book for Adults
The Happiest Little Introvert woke up in time for tea, then ambled through the kitchen singing, “There’s no one but me!” The Happiest Little Introvert stopped dead and gave a hoot: she’d reached a well-thought-out retort for last week’s lost dispute. Two hours hence, our Introvert sat digging through her clutches. The goldContinue reading “The Happiest Little Introvert’s Night on the Town: A Child’s Book for Adults”
Snark on the Side 