45 Minutes of Airtime Later

Point 1: Don’t tell Viki, but she is being replaced.

Point 2: “Free”, my foot.

Point 3: Mumbled Customer Service lines designed to inspire confidence:

  • If this screen would just quit wobbling around…
  • Where’s the continue button? There it is. Finally.
  • You’ll just hear some brief silence…”
  • And that will be…let’s see…two and forty-nine…
  • I knew it was going to do that. I knew it would.

Point 4: If you need to reach me, leave a message on my personal Morse telegraph key.


Published by Jen

The author of Snark on the Side is not your average run-of-the-millennial generation. Jen is a contradiction in terms: a graceful klutz, a smart blond, a math-savvy English degree-holder, a southern liberal, and an adult amateur equestrian who doesn’t match her saddle pads. Snark on the Side is a work in progress, born out of years of rambling email newsletters and anthropomorphized Christmas letters, small town observations, and the ever-present irony of pursuing a career with a degree in English literature. Thanks for visiting!

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