If you’ve been reading my blog, you’re probably familiar with the ongoing contest of wills between me and my erstwhile ill-tempered computer, Marvin. There was much rejoicing when I discovered I’d be receiving a laptop from the graduate school. Erroneously, I associated the word “new” with that discovery.
Enter Linus Eddie, my two-year-old ThinkPad computer, formerly owned by a Wake Forest freshman/sophomore. Linus is younger than Marvin by a year: his youth manifests itself in that his touchpad works, and he has thus far demonstrated the ability to virus scan and run an Internet browser at the same time.
However, Linus is not without his own quirks…
He has an overly protective streak that can manifest itself in odd ways, such as not allowing me to log on to one of my blogs or access my site feeds. He is also imbued with every network encryption device possible.
Despite that, his battery life is approximately T-eight minutes on any given day. The power outlet is reminiscent of his blankie. He has a loud tantrum when forced to rely on his battery pack for more than ten minutes, and he has goes through withdrawal and abandonment anxiety on “laundry day” (e.g. field trips out of the library).
As a result, Marvin isn’t out of a job permanently. But coexistence for these two androids is not exactly peaceful. The jealousy and suspicion is growing.
It won’t be long.
A general smackdown is coming. I can feel it.
Published by Jen
The author of Snark on the Side is not your average run-of-the-millennial generation.
Jen is a contradiction in terms: a graceful klutz, a smart blond, a math-savvy English degree-holder, a southern liberal, and an adult amateur equestrian who doesn’t match her saddle pads.
Snark on the Side is a work in progress, born out of years of rambling email newsletters and anthropomorphized Christmas letters, small town observations, and the ever-present irony of pursuing a career with a degree in English literature.
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