April 15th. It’s a big day. The post office will be jammed with last-minute tax filers; tax preparers’ hands will be cramping from signing so many papers; Walmart’s quarterly income will skyrocket from purchases of TurboTax; and the federal government will get ready to–oh wait, they already did.
If you’re applying to college or graduate school, April 15th is the day of reckoning. Decisions. The beginning of the end for those on the waiting list. The beginning of pennilessness for those who were accepted (and there were a lot of ‘n’s in that sentence, so you’d better believe there will be no pennies left, because each one needs two ‘n’s, and I think the daily ration is on its way to empty).
There’s a lot to hate about April 15th. But I mean really. It’s just a day. It’s just a little 2×2 square on a calendar, and it can’t help that it was chosen. It’s as innocent as a textbook, and you know how many of those get burned about this time every year.
So let’s stop hating and start sharing some love. With no further ado, please enjoy:
10 Things to Love About April 15th
10. Six letters: R-E-F-U-N-D. I wish.
9. It’s the only time of year when re-gifting is considered not only appropriate but a cause for celebration. At least when the government does it.
8. It singlehandedly validates all those years public school kids spend learning how to properly fill in the bubbles on a piece of paper. It should be a college major, but people have been ignoring that key skill for years. No longer. Where else can you face so much trouble for filling in the ‘0’ instead of the ‘9’?
7. New Year’s Resolution: I want to stop worrying about money so much. April 15th philosophy: The less of something you have, the less you have to worry about, right?
6. Because you’ll be waiting in line for 3 hours if you venture into the post office to mail your return, look at it as a great time to meet all the people in your community whom you’ve never seen. AND you have a ready-made conversation topic. Then, when you bump into them in the grocery store on a normal day, you’ll be amazed how friendly and happy they are.
5. Let’s face it: somewhere in the corporate world, someone desperately needs a manicure and a facial on a cruise. As you watch your tax check disappear into the mail slot, you should feel deep in your core the great good that money will be doing. The National Organization of Smooth-skinned Executives (NOSE) might even send you a medal one of these days.
4. Finding loopholes. It’s a job. AND it keeps in business the people who sell specially coated pieces of string in rainbow colors for $9.99 plus tax, because children have to practice Cat’s Cradle and Jacob’s Ladder when they’re young or they’ll never learn to find the best loopholes on their 1040.
3. The “I will not attend” card you are sending–with much agony–to a college or graduate school will be recycled into a “just kidding, we want you after all, so drop all those alternate plans you made and give us your money” card for some poor soul on the waiting list.
2. This is your big chance to see what it feels to send a rejection letter. Recognizing that it feels frightening and ominous and devastating-like-giving-away-your-third-child, take satisfaction in knowing that all the schools that rejected you had to suffer the same pain. Maybe? Just a little? Pretty please?
1. This day marks the greatest possible length of time remaining before April 15th will come around again.
Now that’s something to celebrate!