Oh Where, Oh Where

Wanted: one brain, of moderate intelligence. Last seen: somewhere in the Sandhills region, not quite a week ago. Reward: the preservation of the unlucky humans who chance to come in contact with its owner.

Oh where, oh where
Has my little brain gone?
Oh where, oh where can it be?
With my pons in strife
leaving sleep lost again,
Oh where, oh where can he be?
I think he went down
By the lake last week
To see just what it could see,
And in the depths
Was a globe so bright,
The occipital lobe fled from me.

Oh where, oh where
Has my little brain gone?
Oh where, oh where can it be?
Now the axons feel doubt,
leaving thalamus blind.
Oh why, oh why can’t I see?

I last saw it in the south part of town
Where the cerebellum ran free
Now I just can’t stand up to find it again
I keep ending up on the ground
Perhaps my coworkers have some idea
They may have seen it go by
Who knows where
My brain might have chosen to go
But I’ve got to give it a try.

Oh where, oh where
Has my little brain gone?
Oh where, oh where can it be?
With no temporal lobe–
–I was saying, again?
Oh where, oh where can it be?

Have pity, cruel world.

(Original lyrics courtesy of KidSongs.com)

Published by Jen

The author of Snark on the Side is not your average run-of-the-millennial generation. Jen is a contradiction in terms: a graceful klutz, a smart blond, a math-savvy English degree-holder, a southern liberal, and an adult amateur equestrian who doesn’t match her saddle pads. Snark on the Side is a work in progress, born out of years of rambling email newsletters and anthropomorphized Christmas letters, small town observations, and the ever-present irony of pursuing a career with a degree in English literature. Thanks for visiting!

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