The Twelve Days of Finals

In celebration of finishing the first semester of grad school, and in proper holiday spirits, I am proud to bring to you, for the first time in the history of this blog (wow, that sounded very pompous, didn’t it?)…The Twelve Days of Finals (to be sung appropriately).

Enjoy!

The Twelve Days of Finals OR The Twelve Final Days

1. The last week of classes, I saw a long, long road
To freedom from Tribble Hall

2. The last Tuesday classes, an abstract due at ten
Write quickly now
Toward freedom from Tribble Hall

3. The last Wednesday classes, I saw the break ahead
Course evals
Write a little more
And then freedom from Tribble Hall.

4.
On the penult day of classes, I had a paper due,
Send it on Blackboard,
Course evals
Write a little more
And freedom from Tribble Hall.

5. On the last day of classes, I thought my time was free
It’s getting cold
Bluff a Latin quiz
Course evals
Write a little more
And then freedom from Tribble Hall. (right)

6. On the first day of reading, I saw the light ahead
Papers keep coming
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
Only six hours in Tribble Hall.

7. On the second day of reading, a Latin test ahead
-bo, -bis, -bit, -bimus
Papers keep coming
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
And eight hours in Tribble Hall.

8. On the first day of finals, three papers loom ahead
Conjugate “esse”
Time to check Facebook
Save every minute
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
Elev’n hours in Tribble Hall.

9. On the second day of finals, the caffeine level’s high
Three papers queuing
Free food at midnight
Time to check Facebook
Save every minute
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
And twelve hours in Tribble Hall.

10. On the third day of finals, I felt the panic grow
Don’t lose your outline
Three papers looming
Free food at midnight
Time to check Facebook
Save every minute
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
Thirteen hours in Tribble Hall.

11. On the fourth day of finals, no more excuses now
Panic at midnight
Don’t lose your outline
Three paper deadlines
Free food at midnight
Time to check Facebook
Save every minute
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Find more books
Write a little more
Fifteen hours in Tribble Hall.

12. On the fifth day of finals, the end of all has come
Double the coffee
Panic all morning
Back up your finals
Three paper deadlines
Eight hours of writing
No time for Facebook
Save every minute
It’s getting cold
Gripe about the work
Write last words
Let the papers go
And then freeeeedom from Triiiiibble Hall.

Merry Christmas in 7 Days!!!!

Published by Jen

The author of Snark on the Side is not your average run-of-the-millennial generation. Jen is a contradiction in terms: a graceful klutz, a smart blond, a math-savvy English degree-holder, a southern liberal, and an adult amateur equestrian who doesn’t match her saddle pads. Snark on the Side is a work in progress, born out of years of rambling email newsletters and anthropomorphized Christmas letters, small town observations, and the ever-present irony of pursuing a career with a degree in English literature. Thanks for visiting!

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